For about $350US, I can blow up a buffalo with an RPG-7. A full, real life buffalo. I got the offer last night and I've been thinking about it way too much. Just imagine the look on his eye just as he sees a screaming rocket coming towards him. Then imagine the brains, guts and glory spewed across the field. Jesus. I think the only thing holding me back is that if I miss, I still pay the $350. The money's for the rocket round, nobody gives a fuck about the buffalo.

So that's why I decided to leave thailand. It's too much here. The devil can sit right next to you and you can take him by the hand and show him something new. Anyway, I need a break. I've been in Chiang Mai long enough to start running into people I know everywhere. It's no longer anonymous. I can't even talk to a girl anymore without getting the evil eye from some girl I used to know or her nosy friend. I've had enough, at least for now. If I don't leave now, it won't be long before I end up covered in buffalo guts.

So we're heading up to the northern tip of Thailand, then taking the two day boat down the Mekong river into Laos. For the next few weeks I'll be following the river down through Cambodia, through dirt and shit and disease and poverty and beautiful, untouched landscapes. Hopefully that'll get my head on straight and get me the hell out of Gammorrah before I end up with a hole in my pocket and possibly somewhere else. I just learned yesterday that the room I've been staying in for the past week was the scene of the brutal murder of a 24 year old western girl about two years ago. In my bed.

So I get two more nights of trouble before I head out. I've been looking long and hard for a Santa Suit but, for some reason, they're a bit hard to find out here. In the spirit of Santarchy, I had found friends who would do a Rude Santa pub crawl with me but alas, drunk santas without suits are just drunks. So it shall be.