Thanks, Cromie for the dragon suggestions but I don't think my bike is quite up to the challenge of being named after a dragon (kinda like naming my housecat Tiger). Unless there's a dragon with Emphesyma.

I am tempted to call it Nuts 'N' Gum, but because it represents what the thing's made out of (I had to get the engine glued back together when it stopped an hour outside of Dehli because the valve nuts had shaken off) and not for whatever "else" that could mean. But you're right, John, about the fecal references. When you suggested the "Turn Rattler," I began to wonder at the source of my diarhea (the rear shocks need replacing). So I've settled on it:

The Liquifier.

Now THAT's Badass (pun intended).



OK So here's what I've been really spending my time on in Dehli. I was going to not talk about it 'till it's finished but it's what I've been doing and I guess that's the purpose of this blog. Why else would anybody WANT to spend a week in Dehli?

I'm sending a bike home. I just bought the frame before I left, a 1964 Royal Enfield rusty jumble of steel that RUNS hilariously. The steering pulls to the left, the front brake doesn't work at all, there's no battery, it basically looks like it's been buried since '64. But parts here are cheap, and labor's even cheaper. So, I bought it for about $500 and for the same price, I'm replacing everything and sandblasting the rest. Totally rebuild the engine, gearbox, clutchbox, and drivetrain, sandblast and chrome up the original front wheel, get the old tan seats with the springs under them. But more importantly, I'm lowering the back wheel and getting longer front forks with the wraparound handlebar. It'll be a chopper. A British Colonial Chopper. It'll be "something else" anyway, but it's been so much fun deciding the details over the past few days that I haven't got to much traveling. I'm driving up to the Himalayas right now, and the bike should be finished by the time I get back (an American's putting it together, otherwise it definately would not) and I'll get to see it and make some final changes before it gets shipped to LA.

So if anything will need a name, it'll be that one. But I could use some help with this one thing I've been battling over. It's a 350cc engine right now, and gets just over 80 miles per gallon. But it doesn't go much past 60mph, and anything over 50 is bad to sustain. I could have it converted to a 500cc (22 horsepower instead of 18), and it'll eat 60mpg but get up to 70mph if I need it to. I've been driving in India and Southeast Asia for 6 months, and out here there's rarely a chance to do 60, but will I need the 500cc for a city bike? It'll cost $200 more for the conversion, plus the extra gas costs. In either case, it'll be a slow cruising bike, so maybe I should just keep the gas milage? Any advice?

But oh, man it's a fun project.

Moving on, last night I stayed at the worst hotel yet. There was a HIVE OF WASPS in the bathroom. I made the mistake of killing a mosquito by smacking the wall it was on, and in few seconds the room looked like a scene from "The Birds," except I was the screaming girl with the arms flailing. So they moved me to another room, which had almost as many mosquitos as the first, and when the power cut out at 1AM (for good because of massive electrical storm), there was no fan to save me. Back too Malaria pills for me.

I checked into another hotel here in Rishikesh (oh yeah, I drove 6 hours in the teeth-grinding Indian traffic to get here, and broke down an hour outside of dehli right across the street from a mechanic. $3 and one hour later I was back on the road, getting run off the tarmac by the big diesel trucks going against me in my lane), and it's nice here. For the first time in India, it's just real nice to be around. The hotel restaurant overlooks the Ganges, and I just sat there getting gradually stoned as all the people who stayed there came in for a meal and eventually stayed and talked.

Everybody here talks about India. People in Thailand talked about Thailand, but not nearly as much as they talk about India here. But I haven't heard it all yet, so it's still interesting.

So advice about the 350cc to 500cc conversion would be appreciated (John, I'm looking in your direction)